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Wednesday, February 20, 2019

Love is a Battlefield

I remember singing along every time I heard Pat Benatar on the radio. Love is a battlefield. The 80s mantra for complicated romantic situations. Little did I understand how much it applies to loving your children.

My Battlefields

I've been fighting battles for my kids for 18 years. I feel like I live on the battlefield.

My oldest had autistic-like symptoms but not enough to get services or a solid diagnosis, so I fought and fought. I was once told by an “expert” that his symptoms were just a self-fulfilling prophecy. Like I wanted him to be autistic if he wasn't? Ugh. 15 years and genetic testing later, I would love to see this “expert” again and have her see the proof of a microdeletion known to cause autistic traits. Oh, and now he's in college with a 4.0.

My middle child….we were warned he might never talk. He had intensive ABA therapy for so many years.  We fought for that too. And now? Yeah, he's a chatterbox. He skipped a grade and is an all-around genius.

And my youngest. My pulmonary hypertension miracle. That was the hardest battlefield. You can't die from autism. If you have to fight for speech or OT, there is time to make it up. Fighting insurance over medicine? That is brutal. The day my husband was laid off in 2014, I collapsed to ground crying. Not over income or a job. Over insurance. The drug she needed was $10,000 a month. How was she going to live?

I didn't know, but God knew. He knew He was going to heal her. He knew she would get off that pump and that medicine. He knew.

In fact, He knows all our battles. He not only fights along side of us but ahead of us.

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8 NIV

And this is true of all us parents. There's nothing special about me because I have 3 extraordinary kids with special needs. All parents go through battlefields. And God is with each of us every step of the way.


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